tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-55023040579824970072024-03-19T03:39:23.701-07:00Good Company-Being Grateful For TodayWe are trying to bolster positivity in everyone's lives, starting with our own. Anything negative that might be stated in comments runs the risk of being deleted, to preserve the quality of the blog and our intentions as the authors of it. We invite you to share with us what you are grateful for each day, and we look forward to sharing this journey towards a true love of life with us.The Cynical Optimisthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08021217009213421493noreply@blogger.comBlogger67125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5502304057982497007.post-20194996836983001222015-04-24T20:59:00.001-07:002015-04-24T20:59:53.483-07:00Trying my bestI've maybe been the most lonely I've ever been in my life. The year started off somewhat magically. I was with my best friends in the world, I had a boyfriend that I was madly in love with, but sadly, he just didn't or couldn't feel the same. None of them can feel the same. <div><br></div><div>Then after the end, I had this great realization, I can't expect anyone to love me unless I love myself totally. Otherwise I just end up giving and giving and accepting things that aren't acceptable. </div><div><br></div><div>So currently I'm grateful that I'm reclaiming who I am, whoever that is? I don't even know at this point and haven't really known for a while.</div><div><br></div><div>Therefore I've been going on adventures. I went to a pop up dinner recently at Momofuko Siam where the restaurant Husk was having a five course dinner. I went alone and talked with strangers and ate fried chicken. It was amazing! </div><div><br></div><div>On the way home I gave the cab driver some of the extra googie bags I stole. </div><div><br></div><div>I went to a ManServant event and had the most beautiful men pretend as though they were attracted to me. While I know it was about as real as a stripper pretending to like you at a strip club, it was fun to flirt and not be nervous. To feel like I was in control. </div><div><br></div><div>But now I'm home and I'm thinking about how much I still love him, how much I miss him. I know that feeling will pass. I know he's not thinking about me at all, and yes, that makes me sad, but also there's someone else out there and at least now I'm taking the steps to love myself. Even though it's awkward as fuck, and more lonely then I could ever explain...but there will be a day when I don't feel like this, when I'm happy, when I'm happy with myself and I remember back to now, and know how far I've come. Ill own that joy. Because it won't be joy someone has given me, it will be hot I've given myself. </div>That's So Missy http://www.blogger.com/profile/14882805219462455687noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5502304057982497007.post-86360824301664966462015-03-10T03:43:00.001-07:002015-03-10T03:49:24.438-07:00Love people that love you<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue Light', HelveticaNeue-Light, helvetica, arial, sans-serif;">Today was the first perfectly sunny and warm day, sun starved New Yorkers filled the streets and it made me happy. and it seemed perfectly timed for me to leave and go see my mom. I love my mom. There's literally no one like her, who's as kind and thoughtful or works as hard as she does. She's really taught me a lot about how I want to be as a human. </span><div><br></div><div>I'm grateful that I got to film a commercial with Paula Abdul, who I used to make up every singe dance to her music, and to meet her in real life was pretty much one of the best days I've ever had. It reminded me also that I love acting. I love being on camera. That there's this part of me that needs to put all of my energy there, and put no more of my energy into things like dating and trying to force someone to love me, which I'm done with. It's so silly. We should love people who love us back, instead of hoping someone will feel that same way. It's such a waste, it caused saddness that never needed to be there. </div><div><br></div><div>The guy I was dating for eight months would say he loved me, he'd do such sweet loving boyfriend things, but then he would also do super crappy hurtful things. It was because he just didn't know how he felt, or he couldn't go to that place, but I wished he could have been more direct. Because he wasn't and he kept giving me hope, but maybe it's because it was hard for him to say goodbye, because he just decided we'd never be right, so he never let himself go. And I can't argue with perception. </div><div><br></div><div>In an odd way, I'm grateful that I had this shitty week and that I have closure now. Which is why I'm back here. The guy I loved, he's just wasn't it. And to finally accept that was painful and made me go crazy looking for reasons why, because I'm not good with abandonment, because no one is. So I needed reasons to hate him and I found them, by being crazy. But after the anger left and I looked at what I'd done, I wasn't proud. I didn't hate him and I could never. I was hurt and handled it like a 22 year old girl. It was embarrassing and not the woman I want to be. </div><div><br></div><div>Who cares if I'd been right or wrong? In the process of trying to win the ending, I was the one who lost. I lost any hope of a real friendship with him in the future, and more importantly, and I've never done this...I hurt my friend in the process. I hurt someone that really does love me, and I love her more than anything...and it kills me that I did that. Yes, I have a borderline personality, but I've been working on that for over a year. I'm stubborn! I need to just control myself anyway possible. Because I don't want to be that girl, because I'm not that girl. But I just wanted a simply, I'm sorry. And it wasn't gonna ever happen. That's something that will happen again and I just need to be okay with that. </div><div><br></div><div>You're probably wondering why I would be greatful for a breakdown and acting crazy? Because we do at some point break, and even if it didn't feel like it at the time--it was a choice. And I didn't like that choice in the end, but it wasn't the first time I'd chosen that path, to get angry and weird and be this terrible version of myself because I'm actually sad, because I don't want that person I lived to go, because I want to fight to save us. But there wasn't an us. I should have just walked away, and next time I will. </div><div><br></div><div>But I'm happy that that was my bottom, and I refuse to date until I totally love myself, until I have trust and faith in men again, until I'm so stupidly happy with myself that I would only accept someone that loved me in that same way, and not just someone who says they love me, but their actions don't match their words. </div><div><br></div><div>A part of being grateful sometimes is when we learn that we aren't perfect, but have a good heart and the desire to be better. That the choice is to make people I love feel how I want to feel, whether it's coming or going. I don't do that. I'm grateful for learning that I want to be loving and have grace. The first key to that is be loving to myself, then my friends and family.</div><div><br></div><div>Therefore: my goal is to be more loving to the people who love me already. Gratitude for what we have presently is the most important kind to give. <div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br></div> </div>That's So Missy http://www.blogger.com/profile/14882805219462455687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5502304057982497007.post-56625313141713088492012-03-04T06:15:00.002-08:002012-03-04T06:26:43.195-08:002012As I sit here, trying to acclimate a new cat in a previously one cat household, I have accidentally hit the link to this blog. I had forgotten all about it. While my life is a little worse for the wear than it was when I started this, I still find things to be grateful for every day. Like the fact that the cats have not (yet) killed each other. They've actually gotten past hissing and are now "talking" in cat to one another. It's sort of cute. And only the second day. For those of you out there who have every had to introduce a new animal to old animals, we are only on day two, not even 24 hours in, so we're doing fantastic. It doesn't change the fact that I feel like a mom having to watch these kids all day and make arrangements so they won't in fact kill each other, but it's good. I'm not going to complain. It could be much worse.<br /><br />That's been my motto lately. Saying (and believing) that, well, it COULD be much worse. All of it could. I have my job, my apartment, I'm in school, doing well so far, I have enough to eat, I owe the government money but we'll figure all that out; in other words, I'm okay. Like, really okay. There are situations in my life that I'm not sure how to deal with as of yet, but I'm okay. I'm super super grateful for the support I've had along the way, which is the reason I'm okay.<br /><br />Well, still no hissing from over there. Good news on the homefront. I will leave you with a video by a band I am grateful for, because they make me happy on my early walks to work:<br /> <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4rz4I69mQMo"></a>The Cynical Optimisthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08021217009213421493noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5502304057982497007.post-39133911953702274752011-09-26T22:29:00.000-07:002011-09-26T22:36:58.069-07:00Brilliant Retard<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
You know that character in the TV show that you think is sort of retarded for a lot of the show, but then out of no where they say or do something brilliant? That's me. I'm the brilliant retard. In a way, it's true. The fact is, I'm not like everyone. I'm not saying this as a put down to myself, but as a joyous compliment to myself, and maybe a way of finally saying, "Missy Moser, you're okay. and you're a little retarded, but also, you're freakin wonderful." I also think it's what makes me human and kind, but mostly retarded in a brilliant way.<br />
<br />
I guess, what I mean to say is. I don't want to feel bad about thinking differently. I can't help it. We're all crazy in someway. The truth is, when you really study and watch people, the majority of us are strange. It's about finding people who match your crazy, but make you feel normal. If you're truly lucky, they'll take your retard and turn it into brilliance. I'm odd in the way that I think everyone has something amazing about them. I mean, not mexicans or old people. but most other people...well, I may have to rethink some of that. "some" people.<br />
<br />
I think in an odd way, I'm grateful for being a brilliant retard. Because in a child-like way, I'm always finding things, I'm not assuming that I know everything. It allows me to take things in. I'm hugely lucky for that. </div>
That's So Missy http://www.blogger.com/profile/14882805219462455687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5502304057982497007.post-23623111929643556042011-06-22T22:49:00.000-07:002011-06-22T22:49:18.039-07:00For Dirty Dirty Music<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"><div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"><div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">Today, I'm going to stand up and proudly say, "I have really shitty taste in music, and I don't care!" I'm only saying that because, I can't help but love pop music. Yes, I'm a 31 year old person that proudly blasts Britney in her bedroom. At the end of the day I'm proud that I can listen to whatever I like and dance in my bra and panties in my mirror alone. I'm glad that's still fun. I will keep dancing till the world ends.<br />
<div><br />
</div></div><iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="390" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/qzU9OrZlKb8" width="640"></iframe></div><br />
Also, this song is pretty amazing. These might just be my wedding vows. I'm not sure. I played this song like 500 or 12 times today. At any rate, I played it a lot. It will make you happy, and then it will blow your mind!<br />
<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="390" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/_-agl0pOQfs" width="640"></iframe></div><br />
On a side note: I want to also mention how grateful I am for Yelp, which is swiftly becoming my favorite app on my iPhone. Yelp, I think you'll be taking over something soon...what? I don't know? But I love you!That's So Missy http://www.blogger.com/profile/14882805219462455687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5502304057982497007.post-67500257023318595912011-06-21T23:28:00.000-07:002011-06-21T23:28:46.229-07:00Grateful for this blog<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">I know that we haven't posted on here in a while, but I feel like the point of this blog is think and focus on things we are grateful about. So what if we didn't do it for 365 days!! People mess up and fail all the time, but you only fail if you really quit doing something. Therefore, I have decided to not give up. This blog made me happy. You know how they say "90% of getting to the gym, is getting to the gym" or "90% of happiness is showing up"? Well, clearly both of those began by getting motivated enough to start over and do something!!<br />
<br />
I want to add personal homework to this blog. It's called for one month only. This is how it works. Make a "things to get rid of list"...what I mean is, things that are wasteful, make me unhappy, cost too much. Then, make a "things to replace that with" Things that will make me happy, things I keep saying I'll do, cheap alternatives. I'm going to work on mine tomorrow while at work, like instead of working, working isn't fun. But I love doing other things while at work. </div>That's So Missy http://www.blogger.com/profile/14882805219462455687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5502304057982497007.post-90162344827595157872011-05-28T07:03:00.000-07:002011-05-28T07:06:16.270-07:00With a fur baby at my feetI write this. It's been a while. I now live in NYC (or close), and have recently acquired a ball of white fur named Pinkerton, a cat of great sweetness and love. He's about four years old, they found him on the street, and all he wants to do is cuddle, or be near his people. We're pretty certain he must have gotten lost, because he's too docile to have been a ferile cat for very long. But he makes us happy, and brings some more life into the apartment that is usually just used for eating take out, watching tv, and sleeping, as all parties involved are so pooped after work. So, thank you Pinkerton, now, go back to snoozing on my toes.<br /><br /><br /><br />~JenThe Cynical Optimisthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08021217009213421493noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5502304057982497007.post-31484319970679715312010-11-01T18:10:00.000-07:002010-11-01T18:17:45.124-07:00Why, hello...We're still here. We're still alive. We're still grateful. I took it as sort of a failure that we couldn't keep this thing going every single day, but that is not in the spirit of the blog. We have been doing great things, getting our lives together. We'll stop in from time to time. Today I am grateful that I got to stay home to rest today, and everyone at work was so accommodating about it, just wanted me to rest and get better. Really? My old boss wouldn't care if I worked till I passed out dead on the floor, unless this would cause a mess she had to clean up. And with that, I shall go to bed at 9pm to get up at 4:30am. <br /><br /><br />~JenThe Cynical Optimisthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08021217009213421493noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5502304057982497007.post-36963657147962852482010-09-18T19:31:00.001-07:002010-09-18T21:06:39.209-07:00Beep BeepI've found that in the first few months of trying to be grateful for things, that I've just become more patient with life. Things that would have normally upset me, traffic, for instance, are now taken with a grain of salt. I think about the one thing I'm grateful for in the situation and it calms me down. I missed my train because no one knew how to use the ticket machines, but the next train allowed me to get the snack I most desperately needed and I still had a seat on the train in which to fall asleep. It's easy most of the time, my only challenge being driving. I am one nasty bitch when I drive, because most people on Long Island don't know how to, and I know in saying that I'm still being aggressive, but it's true. So, my new goal is to be calm while driving. My boyfriend can attest to how crazy I get, so only he and my mother know how big of a deal this will be, but I will write another post on another day, updating my progress. Because there WILL be progress.<br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEioJajFNBKsGpLJDVAEnu0J3ph6BzdfiAXVUYdGBS6sf8bc0GqnW8yvdZYgNCforovvH5FPmClc-hScCX2nLIncSBskvoaI2vxYxjbxIScBpMz4ERHNaiivPoEzWoxuYASkyxvpiXoPkoy5/s1600/RoadRage.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 250px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEioJajFNBKsGpLJDVAEnu0J3ph6BzdfiAXVUYdGBS6sf8bc0GqnW8yvdZYgNCforovvH5FPmClc-hScCX2nLIncSBskvoaI2vxYxjbxIScBpMz4ERHNaiivPoEzWoxuYASkyxvpiXoPkoy5/s320/RoadRage.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5518470966392296722" /></a>The Cynical Optimisthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08021217009213421493noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5502304057982497007.post-46477581925179768132010-09-16T19:17:00.000-07:002010-09-16T19:17:36.914-07:00I have all that I needIt's a funny thing to look around and say, "I have all that I need". Because we live in a world that always tells you, "more is more". But to be totally honest, I have all that I need. This is not to say that I don't desire more in my life, we all have desires. But I don't need anything else in my life. I am content. That's huge for me!! I have so much love, and perhaps not the love that people write about in fairy tales or romance novels, but my life is full of joyful and loving friends that fill my heart with more joy than I've had in years. More joy than I've had from a "real" relationship with a "Boyfriend", so to me, this is as real as any love you could find in a romance novel. I'm having "friendmances" and they kick ass! Plus, I have a show that I look forward to seeing go up every month. I have a job and co-workers I very much enjoy. So, to me, I guess I want to be grateful for having all that I need. I'm not a religious person, but at the same time, I do thank god everyday for the people that have been brought into my life, as well as the ones that have remained for all of these years. Honestly, I'm a lucky duck! I really am.<br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande'; font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 11px;"><br />
</span></span>That's So Missy http://www.blogger.com/profile/14882805219462455687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5502304057982497007.post-17868055186014375392010-09-15T18:34:00.000-07:002010-09-15T18:46:36.827-07:00LunchI am super grateful that my new job provides really great free lunch every day that there's surgery, which is pretty much every day...<br /><br /><br />:)The Cynical Optimisthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08021217009213421493noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5502304057982497007.post-59961386576674666492010-09-13T21:53:00.000-07:002010-09-13T22:05:48.648-07:00Because the love you save today may very well be your own (Take Your Time, Do it Right)<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">“Because the love you save today may very well be your own” Joe Tex</span></div><div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 14.0px;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"></span></div><div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">I was chatting with a friend a few months back about this boy that I liked, yet another hopeless chap. But just like the last boy, this one was “Perfect” he was “the one” and just like the last boy, he didn’t last very long (shocker). My friend gave me this very simple and awesome piece of wisdom, “Why don’t you just focus on you?”... What? I thought to myself. I’ve never done that. I suck at that! There are always a million other more interesting things to focus on (Facebook). Then, I really thought about what he was saying, and I remembered how awesome I am (I am awesome!). I thought, maybe doing myself (not like that) wouldn’t be so bad. </span></div><div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 14.0px;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"></span></div><div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">So I decided the first thing I needed to do was; trim the fat, focus on what’s present. In the past, I’ve wasted a huge amount of time and energy on boys. I was a late bloomer, and not super attractive until I was older, so when guys started finally talking to me in a non “you’re just like my sister” fashion, I didn’t want to stop talking to them. I was soooo excited! Like, You’re attracted to me? Me? Are you sure? At this point I should be over it. But when you’re the fat ugly duckling your whole life, and now hot boys like you, it’s a shock to the system. I’d fall in love with all of them. I suck with boys that I like. You’d think I would be better because I’m 30, but I’m awful! If you want to see a train wreck, watch me around a boy I have a serious crush on. </span></div><div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 14.0px;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"></span></div><div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">At any rate, I stopped dating and I was instantly happier. Instantly lighter, Like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. Sure! I miss things like sex, getting my boobs touched, and kissing (Oh man, do I miss kissing!), and snuggling. But my life is simple now. I don’t look at my phone with the hope of some boy texting me. I’m not sad anymore because someone’s not bothering to see how awesome I am. I don’t care. Now the people that I want to see, I do see. They know and love me just as I am. I can give all of the love I have in my heart without restraint. That’s a pretty amazing feeling. </span></div><div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 14.0px;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"></span></div><div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">So yeah, I totally miss getting kissed, but I was thinking about that. Here are my thoughts on that one. All good things in life come to those who wait. So, Fudge it! I'm going to get kissed again, and it's going to be awesome! But I'm going to take my time from now on. Everything in life is better when you relax and take it slow. </span></div><div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 14.0px;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"></span></div><div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">The next part was, do what I love! Be Creative! Like the Nike ad, “Just do it!”. I took improv classes at The Pit. My friend Tim came up with this brilliant idea to do live readings of fan fiction. We started doing that together. Doing simple things that filled my heart with joy, things that made me happy. Because I’m learning, at the end of the day, it’s truly not about anyone else, it’s simply not! It’s only about me in this life. But if I’m a joy to be around, other people will want to be around me more. Therefore, if I keep being a selfish prick, people will really like me. </span></div><div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 14.0px;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"></span></div><div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">The last part was; just be okay with me. Like Popeye says, “I am what I am and that’s all that I am.” This part is called a process. Being truly “cool” with yourself is a process. I’ve always been a weirdo. Sometimes I love that part of myself, but sometimes I hate it. There are days when I’m in my own head, and I’m actually telling myself, Why can’t you just be normal? But, I’m just me. I’m trying to just let things be okay. To be happy with the fact that, I may never be normal. That I may not ever be the smartest girl, or care about sports, politics, animals, really anything other people traditionally care about. But that I’m awesome just as I am. Because, I’m myself. No one will ever be Missy Moser again. There’s a reason why I’m here. That reason is to be awesome! </span></div><div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 14.0px;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"></span></div><div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">One a side note: I read this wonderful thing! I read that if you love everything, even the tree and the stars, if you love them with no need of anything or anyone loving you back, because you simply love the act of loving--that the universe will know, and the love will come back to you from unknown sources. I think that’s totally true. Sometimes, I think people don’t like me, because I’m pretty nice and reliable. People like people to be all shitty these days for some reason, it’s hard for me to not get sad, because I want to feel like there’s a reason I’m a good person. I think that’s why I needed to read that. I’m not good for payment. I’m good because it feels good. Not because I need something in return. It’s good to be good. Don’t get me wrong, I still do shitty things. We all do. But I try to be a good person. I try to love as much as I can everyday! </span></div><div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 14.0px;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"></span></div><div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">I’m grateful that I’m working on me. </span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: monospace, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><object height="385" width="480"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/FACTx6fhpLc?fs=1&hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/FACTx6fhpLc?fs=1&hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object></span></div>That's So Missy http://www.blogger.com/profile/14882805219462455687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5502304057982497007.post-27077756156698701272010-09-10T23:07:00.000-07:002010-09-10T23:11:11.572-07:00Get LostWhen I was little I used to get every blanket and pillow in the house together and make a nest in the living room, from a young age I'd always had an affinity for small spaces. I even used to nap in the linen closet, curled up into a tiny ball on the second shelf, hidden away from everyone. So it no wonder that I live in New York, where everything is cramped and it's easy to get lost. Perhaps that's one of my favorite things about New York; my ability to get lost. I even love the sound of that phrase...ggggeeeetttt llllllooooosssttttt. To some folks that might seem like the worst thing in the whole world. Not to me! To me that's wandering through Central Park, seeing a movie alone with my pax salad, writing in a diner or at Starbucks (Free Wifi), or simply walking nowhere. I'm grateful for my "getting lost" time. We all need that time where it's just ourselves being happy being ourselves. There's no greater time than now to fully enjoy getting lost.That's So Missy http://www.blogger.com/profile/14882805219462455687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5502304057982497007.post-47927061473943882632010-09-10T22:49:00.000-07:002010-09-10T22:49:53.860-07:00I'm Grateful For Love StoriesLately I've been doing this really silly thing where I ask couples, "How did you fall in love?" I've actually always done this. But I've been doing it a lot. Because people love telling a good love story, and I love hearing them. I love hearing them because, they give me hope. I've never heard a story that sounded like another story. Not to mention, there's no way to tell a bad "how we fell in love" story. Even the worst story teller can tell a good love story. I guess I'm always grateful that no matter what, at the end of the day, there will always be new love stories. There is always something wonderful around the corner when you aren't looking for it. People are always surprising you. The beauty of love is, there's no wrong way to do it. The only wrong way to love is to not love at all. Even if you're already in love, go ask other couples how they met. It's one of the sweetest stories people have to tell. One day, I can't wait to tell my own. :)<br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande'; font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 11px;"><br />
</span></span><br />
<object height="385" width="480"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/guinBnWWuKE?fs=1&hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/guinBnWWuKE?fs=1&hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object>That's So Missy http://www.blogger.com/profile/14882805219462455687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5502304057982497007.post-6892127939625548302010-09-07T09:05:00.000-07:002010-09-07T20:38:50.295-07:00So, after repeating over and over that I would find a job in the city that would pay me a certain amount and having it appear almost out of the blue exactly as I kept saying, I am now starting to repeat things over and over to myself in my head as I drive. Today it's been, "I will pay off my bills, I will pay off my bills, I will pay off my bills." It will happen. Apparently, if I work hard and chant about things happeninf, they happen. It could all be coincidence, but if it makes me feel like I'm doing something, than it can't hurt. Last night I was just grateful to make $8 at the restaurant and ended up breaking $100, unheard of for a holiday or a Monday. Being grateful really helps, or me at least...The Cynical Optimisthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08021217009213421493noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5502304057982497007.post-1514169567540414322010-09-03T19:34:00.000-07:002010-09-04T13:49:18.010-07:00Not giving upI keep forgetting about this blog, but I'm not giving up. Its only been two months. We can do this. I can do this.<br /><br />Today I was thinking how grateful I was for rainy days driving in the car with classical music playing. It gives me a feeling I can't describe, a memory not yet created, or relived again. I'm grateful that I can appreciate the rain, that it doesn't make me sad, but feels like life, because it feeds the plants, the earth, and it feels good the day after when the breeze is cool on your skin.<br /><br />I am not giving up.The Cynical Optimisthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08021217009213421493noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5502304057982497007.post-14935386604708387302010-08-31T21:04:00.001-07:002010-08-31T22:05:12.116-07:00HardWhen we started this venture, I didn't realize how hard it was going to be to write 365 days worth of things we're grateful for. It is. very. So today I'm just going to list a few things that I happened to be thankful for as my day progressed:<br /><br />Waking up next to my boyfriend<br />The subway<br />The sun<br />My puppies<br />My car<br />My friend Gary driving me to work<br />Coffee<br />Work<br />Coffee<br />Not having anything to do at work<br />Having awesome loving friends<br />Having an understanding and awesome mother<br /><br /><br />Just a few. Time to pass out :)The Cynical Optimisthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08021217009213421493noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5502304057982497007.post-31662895591878153842010-08-29T18:56:00.000-07:002010-08-29T19:18:48.801-07:00The Bright SideIt's hard to look on the bright side of things when they get suddenly super shitty all at once (you know, dealing with a bug infestation of your living quarters while you wait for your super late period to come and feel like your going to go insane, along with people starting to question your choice of taking a new job you're very excited about, not huge things, but enough to make someone freak out a little bit after a few 17 hour days of work in a row) but after being positive for so long, it makes it a bit easier. So today, I was grateful that I have been forced into really getting rid of a lot of clothes I don't need. I will donate them. They will make some other person happy. I will lose tons of weight and get new hotter, hipper clothes. I kept saying I WILL find a job in the city, and then I did. It's like meditation. Try it with someone you want with all your heart. I want with all my heart to be thin and beautiful. And I will be. I will.The Cynical Optimisthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08021217009213421493noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5502304057982497007.post-65416382507163443682010-08-27T16:30:00.000-07:002010-08-27T16:55:53.199-07:00Chris GarneauFor about two months now, I've been listening to Chris Garneau non-stop! I love him. He's just this strange lovely man. I don't even know why I love him so much? I just do. I think it's because he's so silly and awkward, but also really sad. I've always loved things that are sweet and sour. Chris has been my soundtrack for the past few month. He's really been there for everything. I'm glad he's been there for such a nice time in my life.<br /><br /><object width="640" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/oiOqX-SQvVU?fs=1&hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/oiOqX-SQvVU?fs=1&hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="640" height="385"></embed></object>That's So Missy http://www.blogger.com/profile/14882805219462455687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5502304057982497007.post-61910989407859637182010-08-27T13:02:00.000-07:002010-08-27T13:09:00.710-07:00I'm so sorry!I have not been a very good blogger, mainly because all these great things are happening in my life, and I keep forgetting. I'm pretty sure that all of the wonderful things that keep coming at me are because I've been grateful for what I had, and the universe and thanking me for me thanking it, and giving me presents. But not presents such as a Wii, more like a job in my city of choice, super understanding bosses who are willing to keep me on the schedule till we figure out if this new job is a good fit, supportive boyfriend, friends and family, and a new outlook on how my life might be. I feel like the more positive I am, the more grateful I am for what I already have, the better everything is, even if it hasn't changed a bit. Ive just got to keep on keepin on, and things will be better than ever.The Cynical Optimisthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08021217009213421493noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5502304057982497007.post-24095303795868612052010-08-24T20:23:00.000-07:002010-08-25T21:40:35.781-07:00Love TodayI fall in love daily. It's horrible, silly really. I suppose it's because people are just so darn fascinating to me, and also every person brings out something different in you. Or you find something you love about somebody, or love about yourself when you're with that person. I don't mean "love, love" I mean even like "friendship love". Either way, love is awesome! These are some of the ways I really love to love! (This might very well be the gayest thing ever written.)<br /><br />Some people bring out the child in you and you can act really silly around them, Like they'd make you want to build tents in the living room, and get every flashlight in the house out, and go inside that tent with every book, blanket, and pillow you have and frigging laugh so hard your stomach hurts, and you piss yourself a little. Just somebody so silly, I could say "Hey, let's take a bath in our bathing suits together like we we're five!" they'd be like, "you're crazy, but let's do it!! You bring the ducky, I'll bring the bubbles."<br /><br /> Then there are some people who help to relax you, like you could just sit in a park all day, Or maybe at the beach... in the sun, with the waves crashing at your feet. They bring a quiet to your head and you can snuggle with them all day in bed. They'll tickle your back and rub your head. You could talk to them, but they are the kind of people where it's not necessary for words to be said, because everything is said in a look, a friendly smile, or a gentle touch. <br /><br />Some people make you think, Those are the people that make me weak, the ones I can play idea tennis with...who serve the ball back. The ones who inspire you to write, sing, dance or paint. Even make a business plan. People that think outside the box.<br /><br />Some just makes you horny, those are fun too. Who doesn't like a little playtime? A good kiss and hugs too. I mean if they happen to cup a boob, that's fine too. A good cupping never hurt me, and it never hurt you.<br /><br />Some are lovely for the things they do everyday, for just being really consistent and kind, and that every time you go out, you always have a great time. They treat their friends and family well, they treat your friends well too. The "All the little things" person. That is the most important person of all. May we all be so lucky to have at least one of those, even if it is "just a friend". <br /><br />People are delightful! I'm so very grateful for all of the many ways I can fall in love, for my friendship or otherwise. Because when you make love, you have love and then you can't get smitten by love. Love should always be something active. It's everywhere! There's lots of it! You should make as much of it as you can. Be grateful for all of the love you have, and all the love you give. That's So Missy http://www.blogger.com/profile/14882805219462455687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5502304057982497007.post-4958842941167383682010-08-21T20:26:00.000-07:002010-08-21T20:33:13.187-07:00BedI'm a bad girl and missed a day. Sorry blog followers!! I've been working 17 hour days a lot. Granted, I did have two days off in a row for the first time in what seemed like forever, but nonetheless, I am writing this after my second 17 hour day in a row. And just before I remembered that I had forgotten again, I swung my feet up on my bed and thought, boy am I grateful for this feeling, for the sheets over my toes, the give of the mattress under my legs, the pressure now lifted from my aching arches. I'm lucky that when I first had to move back home, my mother felt bad, and purchased a new mattress for the day bed in my room, my first new mattress in her house in about fifteen years or so. It was on sale and they took some money off cause it was scuffed on the bottom, and threw in a mattress cover. I could not be happier with my silly little child bed. It comforts me on nights like this. If only I could stay in it more than six hours tonight....The Cynical Optimisthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08021217009213421493noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5502304057982497007.post-15484890442517588252010-08-19T20:18:00.000-07:002010-08-19T20:40:58.546-07:00Going BackA friend of mine once said, "The heart doesn't break, it breaks open." Well, the last time it broke open it felt like shit! And I need a break. I'm kidding. I do think that whatever doesn't kill us, makes us stronger, or at least more creative. The point is, it does something. <br /><br />What the hurt did for me? I stopped dating. My heart had been hurt one too many times. I needed to start over again. I needed to press to reset button. I had become too jaded. I forgot how nice simple things are, like friendships, girl dates, family nights, and time alone. I forgot what it was like to not have anything strange in my life. I forgot what it was like to not have some kind of strange motive. To live a simple life, which sounds super lame, but it's nice. <br /><br />But even more so, I forgot how thrilling the very thought of kissing is now. The act of holding hands. The thought of cuddles. I feel like I'm 12 years old again. I guess that's why I just want friends. I just want to take things slow. I want to talk to guys. I want to play. I want to really get to know someone first, and I want all of those things to be special for me again.<br /><br />So I'm grateful for the unexpected right now. I'm grateful for friendship and taking my time. Because I know that one of these days, when I'm not paying attention, one of these friends are going to pull a fast one on me. But it's going to be okay. Because this time, I know, no matter what, I took my time. I got to enjoy all of the little things. This time, the timing was right, because we both took our time. That's So Missy http://www.blogger.com/profile/14882805219462455687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5502304057982497007.post-26230259916331716752010-08-19T06:03:00.001-07:002010-08-19T06:03:22.918-07:00This was supposed to be yesterday, but I am truly grateful for gaining such a wonderful friend as Missy. I love you!The Cynical Optimisthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08021217009213421493noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5502304057982497007.post-18265858405528441532010-08-16T15:56:00.000-07:002010-08-16T15:57:02.427-07:00Fake Twitter LoversI'm grateful for all of the fake Twitter accounts. I don't know what I would do without my daily dose of Garey Busey, Jesus and Hiter! Oh, how the tickle my belly and fill me up with such joy! I laugh out loud everyday. They've become my boyfriends and my naughty lovers. They're the first people I see in the morning, and the last before I go to bed. I love them so much. Thank you fake Twitter lovers.That's So Missy http://www.blogger.com/profile/14882805219462455687noreply@blogger.com1